1. Long Island Lolitas

The 19-year-old messing around with Christie Brinkley's husband. The baseball Annie looking for love with Paul Lo Duca. Samantha Cole insisting she was once 19, too. Remember when Winger was big? Yeah, it was like that.

2. Shiloh Nouvel Jolie-Pitt brings sexy back

The only hot thing not produced by Timbaland this year.

3. We prefer "Aspartame-rack"

Forget the insane anti-Semitism ("Apocalypto" viewers did!) and revel instead in "Sugart*#s!" - Mel Gibson's delicious ode to the female form. Sorry. It's the seven limoncellos talking.