#1

Elina: Do you know that this is my anniversary of coming to America?

Me: Woah. No. Happy anniversary, dude.

Elina: Yeah, thanks.

Me: Do you want me to tell you that joke in honor of it?

Elina: Yes, please.

Me: You know who have the worst senses of humor?

Elina: Who.

Me: Holocaust survivors. In abortion clinics.

Elina: Oh, man.

Me: Yeah.

Elina: I really love that joke.

#2

Me: Posting that PayPal link on my blog is the sluttiest thing I've ever done.

Elina: Actually.

Me: What.

Elina:
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with the dude who said he owned the NBC Tower.

Me: Huh.

Elina: Yeah.

Me: You're probably right.

#3

Elina: What are you doing?

Me: Eating All-Bran with bananas and prunes.

Elina: You are Captain Diarrhea!

Me: Ha.

Elina: You are the Mayor of Diarrhea-Town!

Me: Ha. It's true.

Elina: Wait a minute.

Me: What.

Elina: I want to be the mayor.

...Happy birthday, Elina Gorelik!

You make life worth living again and again.