I found scribbled today on an old Bijan's receipt a bit of important information from Bloggy McBlogalot's only Miami correspondent. What caught my eye in particular was the note: "Don't suck on her tits." That, and the fact that I tipped excellently.

Watching from her kitchen window several months ago, Nikki diligently reported to me on the unfolding events in her rental complex pool. We did not know if the world was ready then for isawyoufuckinginmypool.blogspot.com. Perhaps we never will. But finally, the story can now be told.

"Even if I wanted to go to the pool I couldn't. Because there are two incredibly good-looking people fornicating in the water. No. No. Don't do that. Don't suck on her tits. Now they're having swimming races but maybe not. She is opening her legs on the dividing bar. Okay, it doesn't look as dirty as before. Now he's looking at her like, 'Hey honey, maybe take it easy.' Now they're racing again. Now I'll take a picture. I'm fine with the racing. Her suit is totally down her back. She has no tan lines. None. Wow. Jesus. This is a woman who does not let a lot get between her and the sun."